A LAMENT.

I DON’T KNOW MUCH ABOUT THE “WHY’S?”
I DON’T KNOW ALL THE REASONS…
BUT I DO KNOW THAT YOU PROMISED YOU’D
NEVER LEAVE, NO MATTER THE SEASON.

THE SUFFERING THAT HAPPENS HERE
IS AT TIMES WAY TO MUCH TO SEE,
BUT YOU’VE SAID THAT IN ALL MOMENTS,
YOUR GRACE WILL BE SUFFICIENT FOR ME.

AT TIMES IT SEEMS SO HOPELESS, FOR BOTH
MYSELF AND THE ONES I LOVE…
IT SEEMS LIKE IT’S NEVER GOING TO CHANGE,
BUT I KEEP LOOKING ABOVE.

I’M LOOKING FOR SOMETHING, LORD,
SOMETHING GOOD TO HOLD ONTO…
AND SOMETIMES IT’S SO HARD
TO REALIZE THAT’S ALL THAT I CAN DO.

BUT THAT’S THE POINT OF OUR FAITH, RIGHT?
TO CLING TO YOU THROUGH DESPAIR…
TO LEAN ON YOU AND TRUST YOU,
THOUGH SOMETIMES IT FEELS THAT YOU’RE NOT THERE.

CHANGES WILL CONTINUE TO HAPPEN,
HAPPINESS WILL COME BUT TRIALS, TOO.
LORD HELP ME TO REMEMBER THAT
ALL I’LL EVER NEED IS YOU.

THOUGH OTHERS THINK IT’S INSANE
TO TRUST THIS GOD I CANNOT SEE…
I WHOLLY LEAN ON YOU, MY FATHER, MY MOTHER…
BECAUSE I KNOW YOU’LL ALWAYS LOVE ME.

STILL, SOMETIMES I JUST WANT TO SCREAM OUT,
“I CAN’T TAKE ALL THIS ANYMORE!”…
IT SEEMS THAT SORROW ABOUNDS
BEHIND EVERY SINGLE DOOR.

I WONDER WHERE YOU ARE, GOD
THEN I REMEMBER WHY WE’RE HERE…
YOUR CHILDREN ARE SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF
THE POOR, THE WIDOWS, THE ORPHANS…ALL IN DESPAIR.

PLEASE FORGIVE YOUR CHILDREN, LORD
FOR LETTING SELFISHNESS TAKE THE REIGNS.
FORGIVE US FOR SHUTTING THE DOOR
TO ALL THOSE AROUND US WHO ARE IN PAIN.

LORD, REMIND US ALL OF THOSE TWO COMMANDMENTS,
THE MOST IMPORTANT ONES WE NEED TO DO,
TO LOVE OUR NEIGHBOR AS OURSELVES
AND WITH EVERYTHING WE ARE, LOVE YOU.

J.N.S. 09-03-08

A NEW PAIR OF SHOES AND OTHER THINGS.

1.WE FINALLY GOT NEW SHOES OVER THE PAST COUPLE OF WEEKS, ALL THREE OF US. I MADE DARRYL FIND SOME, BECAUSE IT'S HARD FINDING SHOES FOR GIANTS AND I WANTED HIM TO HAVE NEW ONES SINCE HE WAS STARTING BACK TO SCHOOL. I DON'T KNOW, I JUST REMEMBER THE FEELING OF WEARING A NEW, CLEAN, COMFORTABLE PAIR OF SHOES AND THAT FEELING OF "NEW-NESS"....COULD BE JUST ME.....BUT IT'S NOT, RIGHT? SURELY I'M NOT ALONE IN THAT!!

2. DYLAN'S LIKING THE "SCHOOL" STUFF WE'RE DOING. I'M GLAD. I'M LIKING IT, TOO.

3. I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE REBECCA'S BABY BOY SOON.

4. I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY MISS MY FRIENDS. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. YEAH, I MISS YOU!!!

5. FALL IS COMING.......AND WITH IT, PUMPKIN CREAMER.

6. I'VE BEEN GETTING MCDONALD'S ICED HAZELNUT COFFEE LATELY, AND DARRYL'S BEEN CALLING IT MY I.V. I HAVE TO ADMIT, HE'S KIND OF RIGHT. BUT I LOVE COFFEE, IT'S MY ONE PLEASURE IN LIFE!!!

7. I RECENTLY WON A COUPLE OF BOOKS I NEEDED FOR HOMESCHOOLING ON EBAY. EBAY IS EVIL, IT MAKES ME WANT TO BUY MORE. I CAN'T BID ON STUFF THAT MUCH.......IT'S TOO FUN.

8. I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS NEW SCHOLASTIC TREASURY OF 100 STORIES ON DVD,. AND CURRENLTY DEBATING ON WHETHER GETTING IT OR NOT FOR DYLAN FOR HIS 4TH BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! YEAH, 4. 4 STINKIN' YEARS OLD. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. WHY DOES TIME MOVE SO QUICKLY?!?!!?!?? HE'S GROUNDED FOR GROWING UP TOO FAST. HE JUST WON'T LISTEN TO ME AND STOP GROWING!!! (I'M NOT TOO WILD ABOUT THE "DVD" ASPECT, BUT I AM EXCITED THAT IF I WERE TO GET THIS, I CAN PUT ALL THOSE 100 STORIES ON MY IPOD....AND DYLAN ABSOLUTELY LOVES LISTENING TO AUDIOBOOKS.)

9. THE LADIES AT OUR CHURCH JUST FINISHED N.T. WRIGHT'S STUDY "A LIVING FAITH"....EXCELLENT. HIGHLY RECOMMEND ANYTHING THAT MAN'S EVER WRITTEN. HE'S A GENIOUS, MUCH LIKE MY HUSBAND.

10. I'M THINKING OF DOING "HAVING A MARY HEART IN A MARTHA WORLD" FOR THE NEXT STUDY.......ANYONE HAVE SUGGESTIONS ABOUT THAT BOOK? I HAVEN'T READ THROUGH IT YET. DID YOU LIKE IT, NOT LIKE IT? INPUT ON THAT WOULD BE LOVELY!!

11.THERE'S A BLUEGRASS BAND COMING TO OUR CHURCH TONIGHT.......I ABSOLUTELY LOVE LISTENING TO BLUEGRASS!!!!!!!

12. I BETTER GO DRINK SOME COFFEE, MY CUTE LIL' BEAN WILL BE UP SOON.