THINGS TO SHARE.

*WE FINALLY TOOK THE BEAN TO SEE “KUNG-FU PANDA”….WHICH HE CALLS “COME-FWEEN PANDA’…..HEHEHE. HE SPEAKS CLEARLY, HE JUST THINKS THAT’S WHAT THE MOVIE WAS CALLED. AFTERWARDS, I SAID, “SO, WHAT WAS YOUR ABSOLUTE FAVORITE PART OF THE WHOLE MOVIE?”……”WHEN THE PANDA SAID, ‘SKADOOOSH’!”….HAHAHA.

*WE GOT TO SPEND SOME TIME WITH MY SISTER AND HER FAMILY LAST NIGHT, WHICH WAS OF COURSE FUN. WE LOVE LIVING NEAR THEM. THANKS FOR THE PORK CHOPS, SISTER! AND THE BIRTHDAY PRESENT, I FEEL SPECIAL!!

*IT WAS CHILLY OUTSIDE THIS MORNING, SO I GOT TO SPORT MY NEW COAT…….I LOVE MY COAT! BUT I STILL LOVE THAT OLD LEOPARD PRINT ONE, TRUST ME, SHE’LL STILL GET WORN, TOO.

*I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I WANT TO DO FOR MY BIG BIRTHDAY BASH. IT’LL BE WEIRD (AS MY SISTER AND I TALKED LAST NIGHT, HER BIRTHDAY WAS JUST A FEW DAYS AGO…) NOT HEARING MY MOMMA’S VOICE FIRST THING IN THE MORNING. SHE ALWAYS CALLED EARLY TO TELL ME….SHE WAS ALWAYS THE FIRST TO CALL ALL OF US. I WAS BORN AT 1:11 A.M., SO THERE WERE EVEN TIMES SHE’D CALL ME THEN!! OH MY GOODNESS, I MISS THAT WOMAN SO MUCH I CAN’T EVEN STAND IT. I’D GIVE ANYTHING TO HEAR HER VOICE THAT MORNING.

*I FIGURED SOMETHING OUT THE OTHER DAY THAT REALLY PUTS QUITE SIMPLY THE WAY PEOPLE TREAT OTHERS WHO ARE HURTING. I WAS WATCHING AN EPOSIDE OF A SITCOM WHERE THE DAUGHTER IS REALLY SAD, AND SHE WAS TALKING TO HER FATHER. THE FATHER SAID, “HEY LISTEN, YOU CAN GO BE ALL SAD AND DEPRESSED SOMEWHERE ELSE, BECAUSE WHEN YOU’RE AROUND ME, YOU START MAKING ME DEPRESSED!”…………IT WAS QUITE CHILLING. IT REALLY PUT THINGS INTO PERSPECTIVE. SOMETIMES PEOPLE DON’T WANT TO BE AROUND OTHERS WHO ARE HURTING, BECAUSE THEY JUST MIGHT HURT, THEMSELVES…..SO THEY SHUT THEM OUT. WHICH IS THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF WHAT JESUS DID. (HEAVEN FORBID WE ACTUALLY “FEEL” THE PAIN THAT OTHERS ARE FEELING, RIGHT?!?!) LORD FORGIVE ME FOR THE TIMES THAT I’VE DONE THE SAME. HELP ME SEE OTHERS THROUGH YOUR EYES, AND NOT MY OWN.

*I. CAN’T. STAND. PUTTING. LAUNDRY. AWAY. NOTICE I SAID “PUTTING IT AWAY”…. I LOVE WASHING THEM, DRYING THEM, FOLDING THEM, EVEN PUTTING THEM ON HANGERS. BUT THAT LAST STEP JUST ALWAYS GETS IN THE WAY OF MY DAY!!! ARGHHHHHHH.

*I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT WHEN WE WERE AT THE FALL FESTIVAL THINGY-MA-JIG LAST WEEKEND, THERE WAS A LIL' PETTING ZOO WITH BUNNIES AND POT-BELLIED PIGS. DARRYL PICKED UP THE BABY PIG FOR DYLAN TO PET IT, IT WAS SO CUTE. DYLAN HAD A WONDERFUL TIME RUNNING AFTER ALL OF THEM, AND HE FINALLY CAUGHT THE BUNNY.....WHICH LOOKED QUITE UNCOMFORTABLE.....BUT HE CAUGHT HIM AND SHOUTED, "LOOK, I GOT HIM, I GOT HIM!!!"......IT WAS SO CUTE.

*I’VE ALWAYS BEEN OBSESSED WITH ORGANIZING THINGS. MY RECENT LOVE IS THE LITTLE SHOE HANGY THINGIES. (LIKE HOW I CALLED ‘EM THAT?) YOU KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT, THE ONES YOU HANG ON THE BACK OF A DOOR AND YOU PUT YOUR SHOES IN THEM? THEY ARE SEE THROUGH THINGS YOU PUT ON YOUR DOOR AND THEY HAVE POCKETS!!!!!! POCKETS, POCKETS, POCKETS!!!!!!!! THERE ARE NOW THREE THROUGHOUT MY HOUSE. AND TWO LITTLE ONES IN THE SCHOOLROOM. I LOVE THEM. THE ONE IN THE BATHROOM IS PERFECT FOR HAIRSPRAY, DEODORANT, TOOTHPASTE, MOUTHWASH, TOILET PAPER, CONTACTS, GLASSES, ETC…… I EVEN PUT ONE IN THE KITCHEN ON THE FRONT OF OUR LAUNDRY ROOM DOOR, AND PUT THINGS LIKE BAGGIES, SMALL PAPER PLATES, RICE, BEANS, LIL’ TREATS, COOKING UTENSILS……OH MY GOODNESS, I’M OBSESSED WITH THEM. ANYTHING THAT ORGANIZES OUR STUFF AND MAKES THE HOUSE ROOMIER, I’M A SUCKER FOR!!! QUICK, GO GET ONE OF THESE….OR TWO!!! IT’LL MAKE LIFE JUST A BIT SWEETER. DON’T YOU JUST LOVE THE LIL’ THINGS IN LIFE?!?!?. ;)

MY HEART ACHES IN SUCH A WAY TODAY
A WORD TO DESCRIBE IT, I CAN’T FIND.
THE WORLD IS DIFFERENT NOW, NOT AS BRIGHT,
MOMMA…SINCE YOU LEFT US ALL BEHIND.

THERE’S SUCH AN EMPTINESS, A VOID
THAT ANOTHER WOULD NEVER BE ABLE TO FILL.
I’M SO HAPPY WHEN I SEE YOU IN MY DREAMS….
THEN I WAKE UP TO WHAT’S REAL.

SOME DAYS I DON’T WANT TO GET UP AT ALL…
I JUST WANT TO PRETEND IT’S ALL A DREAM
I WANT TO TURN BACK THOSE HUGE HANDS OF TIME
I THINK THAT’D BE BETTER….SO IT SEEMS.

RAINBOWS AREN’T AS SWEET NOW,
HUGS STILL SEEM SO BARE TO ME…
THE FLOWERS AREN’T AS BEAUTIFUL
SINCE I DON’T HAVE YOU HERE WITH ME.

I SEE YOUR FACE IN EVERY PERSON
YET I SEE YOU NOWHERE.
I KEEP HOPING AND PRAYING SOMEHOW
I CAN OVERCOME THIS DESPAIR.

BUT I KNOW THAT I’LL CARRY YOU WITH ME,
JUST AS I’LL CONTINUE TO CARRY THE GRIEF.
AND I KNOW THAT AT THE END OF ALL THINGS
WE’LL BE REUNITED, AND I’LL HAVE RELIEF.

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU TOUCHED,
HOW YOU BROUGHT HOPE AND LAUGHTER TO US ALL…
MOMMA, I’LL BE MISSING YOU EVERY WINTER AND SPRING,
THROUGHOUT THE SUMMER AND THE FALL.

SO AS I PLOUGH THROUGH EACH DAY WITHOUT YOU,
THOUGH PART OF ME WILL ALWAYS BE EMPTY…
I’LL BE CARRYING A PART OF YOU AROUND,
UNTIL YOUR FACE AGAIN I SEE.

I STILL NEED MY MOMMA, I NEED YOU SO MUCH…
JUST ANY OTHER MOTHER FIGURE WON’T DO.
I’M STILL A LITTLE GIRL,
AND I’LL STILL ALWAYS NEED YOU.

JESSICA SCHAFER October 6, 2008

FUN FALL THINGS.

*WE GOT TO GO SEE SOME OF OUR FAVORITE FRIENDS IN A NEARBY CITY YESTERDAY, AND IT WAS SOME MUCH NEEDED TIME. WE LOVE THEM SO MUCH!! IT’S KINDA HARD SOMETIMES, LIVING AWAY FROM ALL THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE. SO WE NEEDED THIS TIME, AND I HOPE THEY ENJOYED IT, TOO!!

*WE ALL WENT TO A CUTE LIL’ PLACE TOGETHER THAT WE THOUGHT DYLAN WOULD ENJOY. BUT I THINK I LIKED IT MORE THAN HE DID!! WE GOT TO DO A HAYRIDE, AND HE EVEN GOT TO RIDE A LIL’ PONY. IT WAS ADORABLE. INSTEAD OF A CORN MAZE, THEY HAD A “HAY MAIZE”…SO IT WASN’T TOO HARD, BUT DARRYL SAID, “DOES IT COUNT IF I CAN SEE OVER IT?!?!”…HAHAHA. (HE’S 6’8”….SO IT WASN’T THE SAME FOR HIM)

*THEY HAD A HUGE AREA FILLED WITH PUMPKINS, SQUASH, MAIZE, AND ALL KINDS OF ODD LOOKING GOURDS….SO DYLAN HAD A BLAST RUNNING AROUND FINDING THE PERFECT LIL’ PUMPKIN…..WE HAD HIM PICK ONLY A LIL’ ONE, BECAUSE WE’LL BUY THE BIG ONE LATER TO CARVE.

*NEEDLESS TO SAY, SEEING AUNT NANNY WARMED MY LIL’ PEA-PICKIN’ HEART. I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!

*MY BIRTHDAY IS COMING UP, AND SOME OF YOU GUESSED AT MY AGE. GOOD GUESSES, BY THE WAY. I CAN’T REMEMBER IF ANYONE GUESSED THE RIGHT ONE, THOUGH. I’LL BE THE BIG 28!! WOW, I NEVER THOUGHT 28 WOULD FEEL SO YOUNG. I SWEAR, I STILL FEEL LIKE I’M TWENTY YEARS OLD. NOT MUCH HAS CHANGED, EXCEPT FOR THE LOVELY STRETCH MARKS FROM MY HANDSOME LIL’ SON. (BY THE WAY, I’LL BE MISSING MY MOMMA EXTRA THIS WHOLE WEEK LEADING UP TO MY BIRTHDAY, SO IF YOU THINK OF IT, PLEASE SAY A PRAYER FOR ME. I’D REALLY APPRECIATE IT.)

*DYLAN LOVES TO HELP ME PICK UP AROUND THE HOUSE. HE ALWAYS HAS TWO CHORES WHEN WE CLEAN UP, 1: GATHER ALL RANDOM DIRTY CLOTHES (MOSTLY HIS UNDIES AND HIS DADDY’S SOCKS) AND PUT THEM IN A PILE. 2: ROUND UP ALL HIS BOOKS AND STACK THEM TOGETHER. THE OTHER DAY, HE WAS SPORTIN’ HIS WHITE BUTTON-DOWN DOCTOR COAT AND HAD ALL THE OTHER DOCTOR GEAR ON, AND I ASKED HIM TO HELP MOMMY PICK UP. HE QUICKLY SAID, “MOMMY, I’M A DOCTOR, DOCTOR’S DON’T DO LAUNDRY!”……..”UH, YES THEY DO. THEY DO WHAT THEIR MOMMAS SAY OR THEY WILL CERTAINLY HAVE TO SIT IN TIME OUT.”………IT WAS SO HARD NOT TO CRACK UP LAUGHING RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. CLEVER LIL’ THANG.

*FALL IS HERE. IT SMELLS “CRISP” OUTSIDE. I NEED TO GET MY EYES CHECKED, I’LL NEVER SAY ONLINE HOW RIDICULOUSLY LONG IT’S BEEN…..IT’S THE REASON I CONSTANTLY HAVE HEADACHES. JUST PLAIN SILLY THAT I HAVEN’T GONE YET. I’LL DO THAT SOON…..WHEN I HAVE SOME SPARE TIME……WHICH MEANS I’LL PROBABLY NEVER GO.