THIS IS HOW IT WORKS IN OUR HOUSE.
ME: I AM 5’3”….(ALRIGHT, I’M 5’1’, BUT I LIKE TO CLAIM TWO IMAGINARY INCHES….) I DIET CONSTANTLY, I’M CONSTANTLY WORRYING ABOUT WHAT I’M EATING, I EAT SUPER HEALTHY, I DRINK 8-10 GLASSES OF WATER A DAY…I HARDLY EVER EAT SWEETS. EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE I’LL HAVE A SODA. IF I GAIN FIVE POUNDS, I HAVE TO BUY NEW JEANS....BEING SHORT STINKS. (DARRYL SAYS I'M NOT SHORT, I'M "FUN SIZE) I CAN WORK MY REAR OFF, DOING WEIGHT WATCHERS, EXERCISING, AND MAYBE I’LL LOSE 5 POUNDS IN TWO OR THREE WEEKS. I CAN LOOK AT A PIECE OF CAKE AND GAIN 30 POUNDS. I LITERALLY HAVE TO EXERCISE LIKE A MAD WOMAN IF I WANT TO LOSE EVEN A TINY BIT.
THE OTHER PART OF ME: MY HUSBAND IS 6’7”. HE IS SLENDER, VERY GOOD BUILD. HE CAN GAIN A TON OF WEIGHT AND STILL WEAR THE SAME SIZE JEANS. (BECAUSE HE’S SO TALL, IF HE GAINS, IT JUST STRETCHES OUT OVER ALL THAT HEIGHT.) HE CAN LOOK AT A SALAD AND LOSE WEIGHT. HE EATS WHAT HE WANTS, WHEN HE WANTS, DRINKS SODA WHENEVER HE WANTS, EATS MORE SWEETS THAN ANYONE I’VE KNOWN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE (BESIDES MY DADDY)…RIGHT NOW THERE’S A CHOCOLATE CAKE IN OUR KITCHEN THAT HE’S DEVOURED MOSTLY BY HIMSELF………..I DISTINCTLY REMEMBER ONE WEEK. (ONE WEEK…..REMEMBER THAT) HE WENT TO THE GYM TWICE. HE STILL ATE WHATEVER HE WANTED, DIDN’T MODIFY HIS DIET AT ALL. AT THE END OF THE WEEK (WHILE I WAS STILL DIETING, HOPING TO MAYBE LOSE AN OUNCE…) HE WEIGHED HIMSELF AND LOST 13 POUNDS. THAT’S JUST JACKED UP. I THINK I LOST 2.
SOME DAYS, I JUST WANT TO SMACK HIM BECAUSE OF HIS GENETIC BUILD!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU, SWEETIE. BUT I AM SO JEALOUS WHEN IT COMES TO THE WAY YOU CAN LOSE WEIGHT.
YOU KNOW THAT CARTOON COMMERCIAL WHERE THE COUPLE IS SITTING ON THE COUCH, AND SHE COMPLAINS THAT HE STOPPED DRINKING SODA AND LOST A TON, AND SHE STOPPED AND HER BOOBS SHRANK…….YEAH, I CAN VERY MUCH EMPATHIZE WITH THAT. (MINE HAVEN'T SHRUNK YET...BUT I'M SURE IT'LL HAPPEN BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE DOES!!)
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Posted by jesnicole at 6:39 AM 3 comments
THOUGHTS.
1. MY FRIEND RECENTLY TRAVELLED TO JAPAN THIS SUMMER, AND BROUGHT US BACK LOTS O’ GOODIES. ONE OF THE GIFTS WAS RED CHOPSTICKS!! I’VE LOVED USING THEM TO PUT MY HAIR UP WITH.
2. FALL HAS ARRIVED. I’M SOOOOOOOOO LOOKING FORWARD TO OUR FAMILY GOING TO A CORN MAZE…..(GET IT, CORN “MAIZE”….) ALTHOUGH, I’M AFRAID I MIGHT FREAK OUT. CORN FIELDS HAVE A TENDENCY TO DO THAT TO ME.
3. I LOVE HOMESCHOOLING. IT HAS BEEN WORKING VERY WELL FOR OUR FAMILY. I KNOW IT’S NOT FOR EVERYONE, AND IT SHOULDN’T BE (JUST LIKE OTHER THINGS IN LIFE)…BUT I’M SO GLAD GOD HAS ALLOWED THIS FOR OUR FAMILY, ESPECIALLY FOR THIS TIME. I CAN’T IMAGINE HAVING TO SEND DYLAN OFF TO SCHOOL ALL DAY AT HIS AGE, ESPECIALLY AFTER THIS PAST WINTER. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN TORTURE TO DO THAT THIS FALL. I’M SO GLAD THAT AMIDST THE SORROW AND TRAGEDY THAT HAPPENS IN LIFE, GOD LAYS SOME THINGS OUT BEFORE WE EVEN KNOW THE “WHY’S”.
4. I AM STILL IN LOVE WITH “OVER THE RHINE”. IF YOU’RE LOOKING FOR GOOD MUSIC, GET ONE OF THEIR ALBUMS!! “TRUMPET CHILD” AND “SNOW ANGELS ARE AMAZING.
5. PUMPKIN CANDLES ARE HEAVEN. PUMPKIN CREAMER IS, TOO.
6. I AM SO TIRED OF THE POLITICS IN THIS COUNTRY. PLEASE, IF YOU VOTE, MAKE AN EDUCATED DECISION. DON’T JUST PICK ONE THING THAT’S IMPORTANT TO YOU….THERE ARE OTHER THINGS GOING ON IN OUR COUNTRY THAT NEED ATTENTION. ONE PARTY SAYS, “WE’RE AGAINST ABORTION”….YET THEY ARE FOR STIFFENING THE DEATH PENALTY, FOR MORE WAR, AND FOR MAKING THE RICH RICHER, AND KEEPING THE POOR WHERE THEY ARE…..THAT’S HARDLY PRO-LIFE!!! THERE IS NO JUSTIFICATION FOR MURDER, PEOPLE!!! THE DEATH PENALTY EQUALS KILLING, THE WAR EQUALS KILLING…….IT’S NOT JUST ANTI-ABORTION THAT SAVES LIVES!!! DON’T LET ONE ISSUE SWAY YOU. KNOW WHO YOU’RE BACKING AND WHY. IF YOU’RE PRO-LIFE, BE PRO-LIFE IN ALL ASPECTS, NOT JUST THE ABORTION ISSUE. *ALSO, THE PARTY THAT’S NOT TOOTING THE HORN “PRO-LIFE” IS NOT “PRO-DEATH”….THEY JUST BELIEVE IT’S A WOMAN’S RIGHT TO DECIDE FOR HERSELF. THEY ARE FOR ENDING THE WAR. THEY ARE ALSO FOR HELPING OUT THE PEOPLE WHO NEED HELP FINANCIALLY, YOU KNOW, THOSE SILLY LITTLE THINGS LIKE GIVING FOOD TO THE POOR, SHELTER, AND HEALTH INSURANCE….WHICH ARE ALL HUGE ISSUES FOR MOST AMERICANS LAST TIME I CHECKED!! HOWEVER, THAT SIDE HAS HUGE DOWNFALLS, TOO. IT’S LIKE WE AMERICANS WANT FREEDOM, BUT ONLY TO A POINT. WE DON’T WANT OTHERS TO HAVE THE FREEDOM TO THINK. (WHICH I BELIEVE WHOLE-HEARTEDLY THESE ISSUES WOULDN’T BE AROUND IF THE CHURCH OF AMERICA WOULD DO HER JOB…..IT’S NOT THE GOVERNMENT’S JOB TO USHER IN THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN...IT’S THE CHURCH’S JOB. PLEASE DON’T DEPEND ON THE GOVERNMENT. OUR HOPE ISN’T IN LEGISLATION. IT’S IN CHRIST AND CHRIST ALONE.) BY THE WAY, I STILL CAN’T, IN TOTALLY GOOD CONSCIENCE, BACK EITHER CANDIDATE AT THIS POINT. I TEND TO SIDE WITH ONE MORE THAN THE OTHER, BUT I STILL CAN’T SEE A BETTER CANDIDATE….AND DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE PALIN ISSUE. I CAN’T BELIEVE ANYONE WOULD HAVE THE AUDACITY TO SAY THAT THE WAR WE’RE INVOLVED IN IS “A TASK THAT IS FROM GOD”…..IN HER OWN WORDS. ***EDIT: SOMEONE I LOVE BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION THAT THIS QUOTE WAS TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT WHEN SHE SAID IT SO, THANK YOU!*** TRUST ME, EITHER PARTY WILL MANIPULATE QUOTES TO THEIR ADVANTAGE, THAT'S BEEN VERY OBVIOUS. THE POINT OF MY RANTING WAS JUST TO PLEAD WITH PEOPLE TO MAKE AN EDUCATED DECISION, KNOW EACH PARTY'S POINTS, KNOW WHAT THEY'RE INTENDING ON CHANGING, DON'T JUST FOLLOW SOMEONE BECAUSE OF ONE ISSUEE....THERE ARE MANY MORE THINGS IN THE COUNTRY THAT NEED FIXED THAN THE MAJOR 2 ISSUES OF MOST CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIANS......JUST PLEASE MAKE AN EDUCATED DECISION. NOT A DECISION THAT OTHERS AROUND YOU THINK YOU NEED TO MAKE. IF WE, AS A CHURCH, ARE WANTING CHANGE, THEN WE NEED TO BE PRAYING AND DOING (BOTH)….NOT EXPECTING THE GOVERNMENT TO DO SOMETHING……WOW. I TYPED A LOT ON THIS ONE.
7. HUSBAND IS SO EXTREMELY HOT, AND I LOVE HIM. HE'S A KEEPER.
8. MY SON IS WONDERFUL, ALSO A KEEPER. :)
9. I LOVE LIVING NEAR MY SISTER, I WISH THERE WAS MORE TIME FOR US TO DO “SISTER” THINGS!!
10. I MISS MY DADDY, BUT HE WILL BE COMING UP SOON!!!
11. THOMAS BIRTHDAY PARTY COMING UP NEXT WEEKEND……YAY!!!! DYLAN WAS TORN BETWEEN THOMAS AND WALL-E. HE FINALLY DECIDED ON THOMAS…..WELL, AS OF TODAY, ANYWAY.
12. I’M MAKING BAKED OATMEAL FOR DINNER, IT’S SOOOOOOOO GOOD!!
13. I CAN’T WAIT FOR REBECCA TO HOLD HER BABY!!
14. ONE OF MY FAVORITE PEOPLE JUST FOUND OUT SHE IS PREGNANT!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! CONGRATULATIONS, AUNT BEF!!!
15. MY SISTER’S BIRTHDAY IS THE DAY BEFORE DYLAN’S. MY MOMMA AND DADDY’S ANNIVERSARY IS OCTOBER 3RD (WHICH WILL BE EXTERMELY TOUGH FOR DADDY AND US ALL THIS YEAR), MY B-DAY IS OCTOBER 11TH, AND MY NEPHEW’S IS THE 15TH. I CRINGE WHEN I SEE MY NEPHEW’S AGE, BECAUSE I KNOW DYLAN’S NOT FAR BEHIND…..
Posted by jesnicole at 6:39 AM 2 comments
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
OVER THE RAINBOW.
THERE MAY BE TEARS, BUT HE’LL WIPE THEM AWAY
NOWHERE ELSE YOU’LL EVER WANT TO GO…
BECAUSE SO MUCH HAPPINESS LIES AHEAD…
SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW.
DEATH DOESN’T HAVE ANY POWER THERE,
AND HOPELESSNESS CAN NEVER TAKE HOLD
BECAUSE SO MUCH JOY AND PEACE ARE THERE
SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW.
NOTHING BUT LOVE WILL ABOUND
THE BEST LOVE YOU’LL EVER KNOW
BECAUSE ALL HATRED HAS BEEN VANQUISHED
SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW.
NO MORE WORRIES, NO MORE CARES
EVIL’S FACE WILL NEVER SHOW
BECAUSE IT’S ALL BEEN DEFEATED THERE
SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW.
LONELINESS, DESPAIR, HATRED, AND POVERTY-
THESE THINGS WILL NOT TAKE HOLD
THEY’RE FINALLY DONE AWAY WITH
SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW.
OUR HOPE IS THIS, IN KNOWING THAT
THERE’S NO BETTER PLACE TO GO…
THOUGH WE LOVE LIFE HERE, WE ANTICIPATE
SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW.
WHAT A DAY IT WILL BE TO SEE
THE BEAUTIFUL CITY PAVED WITH GOLD
MY SOUL HOPES TO BE A PART OF THAT PLACE
SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW.
JESSICA NICOLE SCHAFER 09-11-08
Posted by jesnicole at 7:32 AM 1 comments
Labels: My Poetry