I John 3:18

All original content copyright Jessica Nicole Schafer, 2007-2016.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

*AS I SIT HERE TO ENTER A NEW POST, DEREK WEBB'S SONG "THIS TOO SHALL BE MADE RIGHT" BEGINS TO PLAY. SO APPROPRIATE FOR RIGHT NOW. REMEMBER SEVERAL POSTS BACK, I TYPED IN AN ENTRY, "EVER FEEL LIKE LIFE'S JUST BEATING THE CRAP OUT OF YOU"??? MAN, I'M READY FOR THE BEATINGS TO STOP!! LONG STORY SHORT MY HUSBAND'S BABY SISTER WAS DIAGNOSED WITH GUILLAIN-BARRE SYNDROME. AS OF NOW, HIS PARENTS ARE THERE WITH HER IN THE HOSPITAL. SHE'S NOT DOING WELL, HAD A BETTER NIGHT LAST NIGHT, BUT TODAY HASN'T BEEN SO GOOD FOR HER. PLEASE PRAY FOR HER, I KNOW SHE'S SCARED, AS IS THE REST OF HER FAMILY. WE CAN'T BE THERE, WHICH IS PRETTY TOUGH ON DARRYL RIGHT NOW. BUT WE ARE WHERE WE NEED TO BE, TAKING CARE OF DARRYL'S UNCLE WHO HAS TO HAVE A CAREGIVER. I COVET YOUR PRAYERS.

*WE FOUND OUT FROM AN EVENING PHONE CALL THAT ALL THIS WAS HAPPENING, AND HAD TO PACK QUICKLY AND HEAD OUT THE DOOR. THE LAST TIME I DID THIS WAS DECEMBER WHEN OUR LIVES WHERE CHANGED FOREVER WITH THE TRAGEDY THAT HAPPENED TO MY MOMMA, FOLLOWED BY HER PASSING.

*I KNOW BLOGS CAN BE FUN, AND I REALIZE THAT MANY LADIES SEARCH BLOGS LOOKING FOR SOME LAUGHS, SOME ENCOURAGEMENT, HOUSEKEEPING TIPS, PARENTING TIPS, ETC. THOUGH I SO QUICKLY WANT TO SAY "SORRY YOU CAN'T FIND THAT HERE".......I CAN'T REALLY APOLOGIZE FOR REALITY. THIS HAS BEEN MY REALITY LATELY, THE PAST SEVERAL MONTHS, EVEN NOW. THIS IS THE PATH THAT GOD HAS SET MY FAMILY ON. SOMETIMES IN LIFE, OUR OWN BAD DECISIONS LEAD TO FACING CONSEQUENCES. YET THERE ARE TIMES WHEN GOD ALLOWS US TO LIVE THROUGH DAYS, WEEKS, MONTHS, POSSIBLY YEARS WITHOUT EXPERIENCING FABULOUS, JOYOUS TIMES. AND THE THING IS, I HAVE BECOME CLOSER TO HIM THROUGH ALL OF THIS. BECAUSE I HAD TO FACE THE GRIEF OF LOSING MY SWEET MOMMA UNEXPECTEDLY, I HAD A CHOICE. I COULD BECOME BITTER, SHUT THE ONES THAT I LOVE OUT OF MY LIFE, NOT TRUST GOD, IGNORE THE OBVIOUS REALITY OF LIFE THAT WAS HAPPENING AROUND ME.......ALL OF WHICH IS SUCH AN EASY THING TO DO WHEN THINGS LIKE THIS HAPPEN. OR, I COULD FACE WHAT WAS HAPPENING, AND HEAD STRAIGHT THROUGH IT, KNOWING THE ROAD AHEAD WOULD BE FILLED WITH PAIN. FOR ME, THAT WAS WHAT I DID...PLOWED RIGHT THROUGH. BECAUSE ALL OF THE UGLINESS IN THIS LIFE, ALL OF THE HEARTACHE, ALL OF THE HURT, THE TEARS, THE WORRIES, THE FEARS............WILL ALL BE UNDONE ONE DAY. SO I DO CRY, I DO MOURN, I DO SPEAK ABOUT MY MOMMA SO OFTEN BECAUSE I MISS HER!!!......I GET LONELY SOMETIMES, I GET AFRAID, BUT IT DOESN'T END THERE!!!!!!! HE KNOWS. HE KNOWS MY HEART AND HE UNDERSTANDS. NOT ONLY THAT, BUT HE IS HERE WITH ME, AND HE SAYS, "MY DAUGHTER I HURT WITH YOU..".... THAT IS WHY I TRUST HIM. THAT IS WHY I STILL LOVE HIM. THAT IS WHY I FOLLOW HIM. THAT IS WHY I SERVE HIM AND HIS CHILDREN. BECAUSE HE HIMSELF HOLDS THE POWER OF THE VERY BREATH WE HAVE IN THIS LIFE....AND HE ALONE IS THE ONE WHO ENDS OUR BREATH HERE. SO LADIES, RIGHT NOW THAT IS ALL I HAVE TO OFFER. THAT IS MY LIFE FOR THIS TIME. PLEASE KNOW THAT I APPRECIATE YOU READING MY THOUGHTS, I APPRECIATE YOUR COMMENTS. AND RIGHT NOW, I REALLY ASK FOR YOUR PRAYERS. MAYBE MY BEING TOTALLY CANDID WITH WHAT'S HAPPENING IN MY LIFE WILL MAKE SOME OTHER LADY KNOW THAT SHE IS NOT ALONE IN HER PAIN. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.


"THIS, TOO SHALL BE MADE RIGHT."

Sunday, October 19, 2008

A RECAP.

*FORGOT TO MENTION THAT FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER, I HAD TO USE A PORT-A-POTTY AT THAT CORN MAZE WE WENT TO…….I AM FOREVER SCARRED BECAUSE OF IT. UGH.

*ON THURSDAY, I GOT TO TRY ON BRIDESMAID DRESSES FOR A FRIEND'S WEDDING. THAT WAS FUN. SHE LET US PICK OUT WHATEVER DRESS WE WANTED, BUT IT JUST HAD TO BE A CERTAIN COLOR. I'VE LOST A FEW POUNDS AND HAVE BEEN EXERCISING A BIT, AND CAN I JUST SAY THAT I WAS ROCKIN' THAT DRESS?!?! AM I ALLOWED TO SAY THAT ON MY OWN BLOG? HAHAHA. THAT'S A BIG STEP FOR ME, SINCE I NEVER, EVER, EVER THINK I AM PRETTY AT ALL.

*I GOT INVITED TO HELP LEAD WORSHIP AT A CONFERENCE MY SISTER DID OVER THE WEEKEND, AND IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. I HAVE SUCH A HEART FOR DOING THAT, AND I HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO FOR THE PAST COUPLE OF YEARS. SISTER DID A WONDERFUL JOB, AND IT ALL WENT VERY SMOOTHLY. UNTIL I GOT HOME SATURDAY NIGHT…

*EITHER FOOD POISONING OR A LIL’ STOMACH BUG GOT HOLD OF ME LATE SATURDAY NIGHT. IT. WAS. NOT. FUN. I FELT LIKE I WAS KNOCKING ON DEATH’S DOOR ABOUT 12:30A.M.

*DARRYL HAD THE BABY ALL EVENING FRIDAY AND ALL DAY YESTERDAY, FOR SOME “DADDY-DYLAN” TIME…..THEY HAD SO MUCH FUN. AND OF COURSE ATE THINGS LIKE PIZZA, DARRYL’S HOMEMADE BROWNIES (YES, HE’S GOOD LIKE THAT)…….AND WATCHED MOVIES. ALSO, DARRYL DID SOME CRAZY CLEANING FOR ME, THINGS I NEVER HAVE TIME TO DO, LIKE MAKE THE TOP OF THE FRIDGE LOOK NICE, CLEANED AND ORGANIZED MY PANTRY, AND REPLACED ALL THOSE SHINY THINGIES ON MY STOVETOP. NOT TO MENTION HE HAD TO TAKE CARE OF ME WHEN I CAME DOWN WITH THAT CRUD LAST NIGHT…….ALL IN THE MIDST OF HAVING TO PREPARE FOR HIS FIRST EXAM ON MONDAY!!! I LOVE THAT MAN. SERIOUSLY, I HAVE NO IDEA WHY GOD GAVE ME SUCH AN AMAZING HUSBAND, I DO NOT DESERVE HIM. HE LOVES ME COMPLETELY, WHOLEHEARTEDLY, AND UNCONDITIONALLY. HE IS CONSTANTLY A BLESSING TO ME AND DYLAN. MY PARENTS WERE VERY PROUD TO GIVE HIM MY HAND IN MARRIAGE. AND DID I MENTION HE’S PRETTY DARN GOOD-LOOKIN’, TOO? HEHE.

*I AM SO TIRED. MY CHEST HURTS FROM VOMITING. GROSS, HUH? BUT IT’S TRUE. IT ACHES SO BADLY. PLEASE PRAY THAT THIS IS ALL OVER WITH SOON. I’D APPRECIATE IT VERY MUCH!!