I John 3:18

All original content copyright Jessica Nicole Schafer, 2007-2016.

Sunday, November 1, 2009


I was doing the dishes as I heard a blood-curdling scream coming from my little boy. I was wondering what in the world could have happened, I had just walked out of the room to do the dishes while he was viewing a movie about an adorable little puppy. What could have happened in five seconds?!?!?!? I turned the water off, and darted around the corner to him, only to find him standing up and screaming and crying as if someone was yanking his arm off. I asked as quickly as I could....."Baby, what is it!?!? Tell me, what is wrong......what's wrong, take a breath.....". He was heartbroken. He finally cried out, "They hurt him! Those bad guys hurt the puppy's little friend. Momma, they hurt him!". His new favorite T.V. pup had made a puppy friend.....and in the movie, some burglars hurt the little pooch.

So we sat down and I held him as he cried and tried to make sense of what just happened. He just kept saying, "Momma, I'm okay, I'm not crying.....I'm okay. I'm not sad and I'm not crying...". He was saying all this through his tears. It was as if he was ashamed of feeling his own feelings. We had a very long talk. I was trying hard not to cry, myself! We talked about how it was just a movie. But I also told him that whenever he is happy, Mommy and Daddy are happy with him. Just as when he is sad, Mommy and Daddy are sad along with him. We talked about God feeling things with him, too. I told him that God has given him a gift, he has a very caring heart, and he sees the GREAT importance of life. He also sees the importance of feeling for others as they hurt.....

A few minutes later as I was holding him, he said, "Mommy, I was lying to you when I said I wasn't sad. I was very sad, I'm sorry for lying."

I wanted to get the point across to this tiny little human that God made us to live in community. He made us to celebrate with one another. He made us to grieve with one another. He made us to go through the mundane with one another. He made us to feel with one another. He made us to feel FOR one another. I didn't want to see a day when my son didn't care so much for another living being that it hurt him to see life being taken away. I want him to know that what he feels, God feels, too.

(When I use the phrase "life being taken away"....I am talking more than murder. I'm speaking of the life sucked away from poverty....or from doing nothing about it. I'm talking about the life stripped away from an individual due to harsh and hateful words. I'm talking about the life taken away when people objectify one another. I'm talking about the life stripped away when The Body doesn't step up and do Her job to those in need....whatever that need may be.)

Don't undermine the pain someone you know is going through. I could write for days on the hurtful words I've heard from God's own children regarding the grief I've endured through losing my Momma. But I won't. That's not about this. I want to talk about the other side of humanity.

I want to remind you that there are people who care. There are little Dylan's who grew up and still care about the power of life. There are people like my husband who love everyone they comes across in a self-sacrificial way, even those who treat them disgustingly. There are people like Hilarie who care deeply and stand by their best friend through the storms that come her way. There are Krystles who end up going to the doctor because they have sympathy pains for their grieving best friend so badly that they manifest into physical symptoms. There are Kelis that come visit and constantly pray and do random favors for her dear friend. There are people like my sister and her husband who do MANY things for their loved ones that go unnoticed by many. There are Jils who send their close friend a bragbook filled with precious memories from the years past. There are Elizabeths who are constantly thinking of her friend when she has grief of her own to carry. There are friends who come along and pick up the pieces of a family that was hurt beyond belief by God's people. There are friends that stick closer than a brother. They are still here. I promise you that.

The next time you see someone hurting, DO NOT close your door and pretend they aren't hurting. That absolutely WILL NOT make the hurt leave. Do something. If we're teaching our children to "Treat others the same way you want them to treat you.".....are we doing the same thing?

I'm thanking God tonight for those that love Him enough to follow Him, to serve Him and His children.....even when it's hard and uncomfortable.....and requires them to think of someone else before themselves.

"Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth."
-I John 3:18-


Rebecca said...

We had a long convo with a lady at church on Sunday and she was talking about all the hurtful things people have said to her in her FIVE YEAR struggle. I thought of you. I love you. There are people who care and just want to love.

Fruitful Vine2 said...

Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth."
-I John 3:18-

The practicality of that scripture escape many and truth be told at one point in time or another escapes us too though we try our best for it not too. Thanks for putting this out there in blogland.

Andrea said...

Hey sweetie! Thinking of you and praying things are looking up since our last talk. Email me when you can, I love hearing from you. :)

Vicki said...

i read you 2

Melissa said...

You're a good mama!! I hope as Ethan gets older I can teach him as well as you teach your son.